About Our Board Game Review Team: The Obsessive Humans Who Actually Play Every Game We Review

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Last Updated: May 2026 | Written by: Marcus Holloway, Lead Reviewer | Read time: 7 minutes

The Uncomfortable Truth Behind Every Review We Publish

Welcome behind the curtain.

Finding the right about our board game review team comes down to matching watt-hours to your actual power needs.

This is the page where I get to be brutally, uncomfortably honest about who we are, how we test, and frankly, why we even bother doing this when there are already a thousand board game blogs out there shouting into the void.

Short answer?

> Most of them don't actually play the games. We do. Obsessively. Religiously. To the point where it has become a minor concern among loved ones.

My dining room table hasn't seen a proper family dinner in about four years. My wife has stopped asking. My cat has claimed the meeple storage drawer as her permanent bed. The Christmas tablecloth is now a permanent Terraforming Mars play mat with mysterious coffee stains in the shape of Mars itself.

This is the life now. And honestly? I wouldn't trade it for anything.

> ### "If you can't tell me what turn six feels like, you haven't really played the game." > — Marcus Holloway, somewhere around play number 47 of Brass: Birmingham

If you landed here trying to figure out whether to trust our recommendations, this page will answer that question completely. I'll walk you through who we are, how we test, what we measure, and the specific games that shaped our methodology over the years.

The Numbers Behind the Cardboard

We don't do vague. We do receipts.

The Two Bucket Problem (And Why Most Board Game Reviews Fail You)

Here's the uncomfortable truth: most board game content online falls into two deeply depressing buckets.

Bucket One: The Publisher Parrot

Regurgitated marketing copy with a 4.8-star rating slapped on top and zero actual gameplay insight. These reviewers describe the box art, summarize the rulebook, and call it a day. You finish reading knowing nothing more than you did from the publisher's website.

Bucket Two: The Convention Hot-Take Artist

Blistering opinions from someone who played a game once at a noisy convention table, half-drunk on free soda, and called it definitive. They missed half the rules. They didn't see the late-game collapse. But hey, they got the clickbait headline up before everyone else.

Neither of these helps you decide whether to spend $50 (or $120, or $300) on a box that might collect dust on your shelf for the next decade.

The $79 Mistake That Started This Whole Site

We started this site in 2026 because I got burned one too many times.

I bought a heavily-hyped strategy game back in 2018. Beautiful artwork. Glowing reviews. "Game of the Year" buzz everywhere I looked.

I played it twice. Then it sat on my shelf for six years like a $79 monument to my own gullibility.

What the reviews conveniently never mentioned:

• The brutal 90-minute setup that killed momentum before turn one even started
• That turns three through seven are essentially identical with different colored cubes
• That the game completely falls apart at five players due to soul-crushing downtime
• That the rulebook contradicts itself in three different places (yes, three)
• That "variable player powers" actually meant "one power is broken and three are useless"

> ### Expert Tip From Marcus > Before buying any game over $40, hunt for reviews that mention specific turns, specific player counts, and specific failure modes. Vague enthusiasm is the biggest red flag in our entire hobby. If a review reads like ad copy, it probably is ad copy.

Watch How We Actually Review a Game

We believe in showing our work. Here's a great breakdown of what thoughtful, evidence-based board game reviewing actually looks like, and why most reviewers conveniently skip the hard parts:

Our 10-Play Promise: The Methodology That Makes Us Different

Every single review on this site follows the same rigorous protocol. No exceptions. No shortcuts. No matter how badly we want to publish the hot take.

The Five Pillars of Every Review

Pillar One: Minimum Ten Plays We don't write a word until we've sat down with a game at least ten times. That's where the cracks show. That's where the brilliance reveals itself.

Pillar Two: Multiple Player Counts We test every game at every supported player count. The two-player experience and the five-player experience are often completely different games.

Pillar Three: Mixed Player Skill Levels We play with veterans, casuals, and total newbies. If your spouse can't learn it in 20 minutes, you need to know that before you buy.

Pillar Four: Real Living Room Conditions No convention halls. No staged photos. Just our actual gaming groups, our actual snack-stained tables, and our actual three-hour endgame stalls.

Pillar Five: The Six-Month Shelf Test We check back six months later. Did we keep playing it? Did it survive the rotation? That answer tells you more than any first-impression review ever could.

Meet the Obsessive Humans Behind the Reviews

Marcus Holloway, Lead Reviewer

Fifteen years deep into heavy strategy games. Owns 412 games. Has read more rulebooks than most people have read novels. Specializes in economic engines, area control, and 18XX-style train games. Cannot be trusted near a Kickstarter campaign.

Elena Park, Family & Party Games

Former elementary school teacher turned full-time tabletop reviewer. Tests every family game with actual kids, actual grandparents, and actual chaos. If Elena says a game works for ages 8 and up, it genuinely works for ages 8 and up.

Diego Velasquez, Solo & Two-Player

The quiet one in the corner. Diego has logged over 2,000 solo plays across more than 200 games. If you game alone or play exclusively with a partner, his recommendations are gold.

The Promise We Make to Every Reader

> ### Our Reader Pledge > We will never recommend a game we haven't personally played at least ten times. We will always disclose affiliate relationships clearly. We will tell you what's broken, what's boring, and what doesn't work, even when the publisher sent us a free copy. Especially then.

What This Means in Practice

• Honest negatives. Every review includes what we didn't like, even on our favorite games of all time.
• Specific player counts. We tell you exactly which player counts shine and which to avoid like the plague.
• Real photos. Every image on this site is from our table. No publisher stock photos. Ever.
• Updated rankings. When a game falls off our rotation, we update the review. Reviews are living documents.

A Deep Dive Into Thoughtful Tabletop Criticism

Want to see what genuinely great board game analysis looks like? This second video explores the philosophy of long-form game criticism and why surface-level reviews fail the hobby:

Key Takeaways: Why You Can Trust Us

• We play every game at least ten times before writing a single word
• We test at every player count because the experience changes dramatically
• We disclose every affiliate relationship transparently and upfront
• We update reviews when our opinion changes after long-term play
• We tell you what's broken, not just what's beautiful
• We are obsessive hobbyists first, content creators second

Ready to Find Your Next Favorite Game?

If this resonated with you, you're our kind of reader. Welcome to the table. Pull up a chair. The meeples are warm, the rulebook is opened, and we promise to tell you the truth about every single cardboard box that crosses our threshold.

Now go find a game that deserves a place on your shelf, not one that just looks like it does.

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